2010/fashion,

Top styles to drape your hijab this season.

6:28 AM S. H. 0 Comments

By Nasheet Jaffer Khan.

Follow the easy steps and before you know it, yours will be the most stylish shayla or hijab around, find more accesories at Muslim Elegance.

Eliminate the stress of a shayla/scarf that refuses to stay put by working on your base band first. Opt for a wide band or A'mta - a stretchable piece of stitched fabric you can find them at Muslim Elegance- to hold the scarf in place. It's best to use a pure cotton base band as this allows the scalp to breathe while ensuring your scarf does not slip constantly. Use a flower clip better a medium size-We don't want to look like a cammel right?- (pictured on the left) to add more volume." To achieve this, first tie hair in a ponytail, then slide the band over your face to sit around the neck. Next, add a flower clip before pulling the band back up to circle the forehead. Tuck it in for a neat look.

Follow the easy steps and before you know it, yours will be the most stylish shayla around.

1. Flirt with fabric!
While pashmina and silk scarves may be easily available, they are also very last season. the type of fabric makes a huge difference to the finished look. "If you have a round or wide face, opt for a silk shayla (left), which adds more volume to the drape.

Steps for silk fabric
Start by placing one end of the scarf either on the right or left side of your neck. Wrap slowly while ensuring you carefully accentuate the folds for a more voluminous look.

Steps for jersey fabric
Place the scarf/shayla on the centre of the head while ensuring both ends are at an equal distance from the forehead. Take one side and circle it around your face. For more volume, repeat steps with the other end.

2. Hoodie hijab
Ever wondered how some hijabis mange to look effortlessly stylish by combing a hood with their regular hijab? The Hoodie Hijab might just be your one-stop solution. The hood is attached to two long pieces of fabric which balance the shayla or scarf on the head. This is one of the classic styles, especially popular in winter. It looks amazing with long jackets and boots. And is a particular favourite with non-hijabis travelling to Muslim countries too."




Steps
Wear as you would a hood. Wrap extensions - one end at a time - around the neck or pin at one side with a brooch. For a more romantic look, tie it into a bow or at the back of your neck.


3. cowl-neck shayla
Think regal. The circular shayla or scarf's oval drape - which rests at the midriff - helps you achieve just that look. Since these are made of a jersey material, they sit well on the forehead, eliminating the use of any accessories. This easy and fun single-piece shayla can be used in two different ways - by non-hijabis to add some glamour to their outfits or by hijabis with a contrast base band for more coverage. It's perfect for travelling.

Steps
Simply rest the hood on the crown, before you answer the 'mirror, mirror...' question. Use a contrast base band for best results.

4. Gather-top shayla
It makes the cut for its WOW factor. I love the drama created by the scrunched parting and its ultra chic look, which is achieved with minimal effort. This style is practical. It works well for round shapes as it takes away the attention from the face cut.

Steps
Depending on your face cut, opt for either a side or a middle parting for the scrunched area of the shayla/scarf. Wrap one end around your face. Repeat step with the other end. For a different look wrap around the neck before tying the ends together. Oh so chic!


5. Attention to accessories
What better way to make a style statement than to accessorise! Vintage pins and beaded or feathered bands are a quick, easy and cheap way to add style to the scarves you already have. These work best on the classic Emirati black shaylas made of a soft, flowy material - Abayas with matching shayla available at Muslim Elegance. The finished look is perfect for plain abayas.The best accessories are lovely brooches as they add a touch of glamour while holding slippery scarves in place.You can use many different things to accessorise, such as jewellery, necklaces, huge crystal brooches used for bags, in addition to headbands, silk flowers, antique trims and customised pins. This look is a safe alternative for women who don't want to match scarves to outfits.

Steps
With the base band in place, work with a black shayla to achieve the desired volume and folds. Place a headband - Find them at Muslim Elegance- as you would to hold your hair in place. If using a small or medium-sized brooch, pin it above the ear. Balance the look in case of larger brooches by pinning the brooches near the flower clip (hidden underneath the base band). I recommend this look for parties and special occasions.

6. Bandana hijab
You love the rock and roll look that a bandana helps achieve but worry about your exposed neck and face area. Well worry no more. This simple, fun and versatile look can be achieved in a matter of seconds. It helps if you know how to tie a pretty bow. Printed cotton shaylas work best for this look. It is advisable to use a bold colour base band so as not to ruin the look with too many details. This works best to add the quirky element to a modest ensemble. The bandana wrap can also be substituted for hats/caps/ beanies, a thin hijab.

Steps
Use a base band that ends at the collar bone. Once in place, tie the printed shayla or scarf as you would a bandana. Khalaas!
marriage

Islamic Foundations for a Happy marriage IV

11:12 PM S. H. 0 Comments

11. Family

Paternity can be a difficult experience, especially if parents are not well informed. This may generate an extra pressure on the marriage relationship.

Sometimes, couples are too naive about the changes that come with the new way of life. This can cause depression in some cases, misunderstandings and resentments. A golden rule that we must always bear in mind is that family comes first.

If you notice that your family is not happy or is not your main priority is time to take matters into and sit down and talk with the heart and mind open. Couples living with their parents have additional responsibility of caring for them. This load can be very stressful if the couple is not prepared to face such a situation.

It should be a very precise plan for the respective parents about who will hand over primary responsibility for care and what the type of assistance will be given.




12. Feelings

The Prophet Muhammad (sallallaahu 'alaihi wasallam) said that Allah Ta'ala forgives all sins if we repent. However, He will not forgive those who have committed against another person or their feelings, unless that person forgive us.


Couples are usually very sensitive about the feelings of the spouse and tend to think they always know what the other means. It is amazing how people are more careful and kind to strangers than with their loved ones. One must always be attentive and be especially careful with the feelings of the husband or wife and, if passing them to carry, rushing to apologize for any lack in this regard.

Since nobody knows what time the person we love may leave this world, it is advisable to correct our mistakes as there is still time to do so.




13.Freedom

Marriage in Islam is a society, not slavery or servitude. Seeing your wife as a property is an idea alien to the Islamic conception of the roles of wife and husband. Team spirit is enhanced when members of it feel free to be themselves. Freedom in the Western sense means being free to do what they feel like it or to be selfish. Give freedom to the wife or husband means to consider their needs and recognize their limitations.


14.The Romance



Many successful marriages have maintained a jovial behavior in marital life, eg by some special names and secret forms of communication.



15.The Openness

Misunderstandings often occur when the parties are not honest with each other. A marriage can exist only if the couple feel safe to speak out with due consideration for the feelings of others, without compromising their personal views. When there is open communication, it is possible to develop the closeness or depth understanding of the inwardness of the other.
Dubai,

True values the solution for emotion-driven spending

11:28 PM S. H. 0 Comments

I found this article really interesting and it reflects the true situation that Emiratis are living right now.

With a Muslim social in a new rich country on develop we have as a result, an amount of Muslims with a lot of money to spend, the values of religion were left behind, the social status change in an exorbitant way reaching a level of luxury and materialism easy to get used to and very difficult to leave, but, suddenly the World economic situation changed and what is left is a social trying to keep a level in society regardless of what they have to do to achieve it,...In a past post "Dubai: What will happen to the paradise on earth" I wrote the next quoranic verse:

"Luxurious living is an enemy of every call towards,truth, justice, and social reform"
Parents are not taking care of their sons, they are Taraf, and are making use of Reba (when using credit cards).

Quran says:
17:16 When we decide to destroy a population, We (first) send a definite order to those among them who are given the good things of this life and yet transgress; so that the word is proved true against them: then (it is)We destroy them utterly.
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When Saeeda Al Suwaidi is upset or depressed, the mall is an over-the-counter medication to soothe her mood and chase away those mid-week blues.

"I go shopping and buy whatever makes me forget what I'm in, whether it's necessary or not," says the 27-year old Emirati supervisor with the Commercial Bank of Dubai.

Her retail vice is shoes. In the last month alone, she purchased about 30 pairs, half of which are still in their boxes she says. Typically she heads to the mall four times a week and spends an average of Dh3,000.

But emotion-driven spending is not just exclusive to Emiratis. Suze Orman, psychologist and financial author of three consecutive New York Times bestsellers including The Road to Wealth, says, "Our emotions influence up to 80 per cent of our financial decisions."

In the UAE, which ranks seventh among the world's most exciting retail growth hot spots, Emiratis and expatriate consumers' spending patterns differ according to vastly different emotional priorities. For Emirati youth, trips to the mall fulfil their families' idea of safe and legitimate fun, a way to let go, and a vent for boredom.

"Young men and women are not encouraged to stay out of the house after 9pm. They don't hang out in the evening, there is no clubbing scene for them," explains Emirati cultural consultant and writer Ali Al Saloom. "The only way to accomplish that excitement, girly talk, food, is the malls. They are the kings in giving this."

He said the reason malls do not simply represent a souq is that they are spaces to socialise and spend on meals, skiing, skating, and cinema. "Which place can parents accept their girls to go to that's air-conditioned, safe, and come home early? The mall," he said.

Sometimes a spending spree is fuelled by the need among Emirati women to mark their individuality among women clad in uniform, albeit designer and expensive, abayas. "It's about self-attractiveness. How she looks slightly different from other girls. It's a kind of competition but in a peaceful way," explained Saeeda.

Emirati households spend 13 per cent of their income on clothing and footwear compared to seven per cent by expats, according to a survey by the Statistics Centre in Abu Dhabi in 2009.

Al Saloom says there is some truth in the stereotype that local women spend a lot of their time shopping and submitting to the social pressure of carrying off a brand-centred look. "Social pressure is in the eye of the beholder. People only say there's pressure, but it actually comes from insecurity and a culture that is about being well-kept," he said, adding that some parts of the country are like Beverley Hills.

Submitting to every emotional whim by spending your cares away has ultimately created a consumerist culture in the UAE. "Communities here are becoming very materialistic unfortunately but we cannot be blamed for it," said Al Saloom, citing Jumeirah, a predominantly expatriate neighbourhood. "Everyone looks like they came out of a magazine and [the area] is well kept."

K.V. Shamsudeen, Director of Barjeel Geojit Securities LLC and a financial adviser, said many spent a "good portion" of their income on luxury brands to create an image but this was financially unsustainable in the long run. "Many working Emiratis are in a debt trap because they use credit cards for this kind of shopping."

Return to values

A return to the values of faith, which advises moderation in all aspects of life, is one solution to excessive spending habits, Al Saloom suggested. "If women are devoted to their faith they will realise they don't need to be so fashionable that they have gold on their abayas, to me that's a silly thing and there is no need for it," he said. "Project yourself in a way that matches your faith and culture not an Eiffel tower on your head and too much make up."

He said the family is "the best school" to teach children the value of money and avoid spending it according to mood on unnecessary items. "When you see a seven-year old carrying a Blackberry that explains it completely," he said, adding that children who break with family values become spendthrifts.

"Kids enter a shop with money, and ask ‘how much is this? Yalla, give me, yalla bye' and people think this is independence but they need to learn from parents how to bargain and be respectful," he said, adding that this overspending trend greatly disturbed the older generation.

Al Saloom encouraged young Emiratis to earn their own money through so they could appreciate the hard work behind it and not take it for granted. "There is carelessness about the importance and appreciation of money when we don't earn it," he said.

An expatriate dilemma

Beyond the sky-scrapered silhouette of a city overdosed on malls lurks a darker world: hard-earned money, long working hours, meager income, and a noose of debt is the reality of many South-Indian expatriates providing for their family back home.

In 2006, there were 143 suicide cases of Indian expatriates — 75 per cent were due to depression about financial issues, said Shamsudeen.

The emotional drive behind their overspending is the need to satisfy the ever-increasing demands of their families. They spend up to $3,000 (Dh11,000) and take high-interest loans from unauthorised lenders at home to get a visa to the UAE, without about two-thirds of them living here without family, according to Shamsudeen.

Their motives?

"Their strong urge to make their families happy," he said. They assume that because their sole bread-winner is living in a rich country he is able to afford all their wishes. The families expect gifts during festive seasons like Christmas, Eid, Diwali, and Onam, he added.

Expat workers also feel the pressure to overspend on emotional occasions such as a daughter's marriage, treatment of a sick family member, and educating their children to give them a better life, said Shamsudeen, who advices expats on financial planning.

Dr Raymond Hamden, Clinical and Forensic Psychologist at the Human Relations Institute in Dubai, explained that the psychological reasons behind overspending is that workers are quantifying their love for family in material terms and justifying their absence away from home and loved ones by the ability to buy these gifts.

Failing to understand the sacrifices that the workers make, the families get used to an extravagant lifestyle.

With inflation in India rising more than 10 per cent and food prices increasing by more than 17 per cent, the cost of living has increased and the workers must send more money home, Shamsudeen explained.

But as employers cut back on overtime, earnings decrease, he added.

"Like salt in the wound, the Indian rupee has appreciated so when they remit their limited earnings they get less money back home," Shamsudeen said. Then they are compelled to take a loan. "By taking a loan you become the slave of the lender and will have to take multiple loans."

To escape this vicious cycle, expats must inform their families of their real financial situation to curb unrealistic demands, Shamsudeen emphasised.

He advises two main saving techniques. The first is an Expenditure Control Chart. It includes the amount you intend to save every month and five columns with your expenditure, amount spent, essential, optional, and unnecessary items. This gives a better understanding of necessities.

The second is the Micro Saving and Systematic Investment concept whereby you save Dh1,000 monthly in convenient currency and invest it with a 12 per cent return on an Indian mutual fund for 30 years to save Dh3.52 million.

He urges expat workers to think differently about money and change their definition of saving into "what is kept aside before spending." They should also tell their families that the remittances must be used for expenses and saving.

Shamsudeen also advices expats to deal wisely with credit card debt. Even high-profile executives commonly land in Dubai jails for mismanagement of credit card debt, he added, advising the sale of assets to pay off debts.

"Credit cards are a big villain in our society," he said.


By: Deena Kamel Yousef
Edited by That's Me